In this post, you are going to learn the signs of an unhappy relationship, what to do when you are sad in a relationship, how to end the relationship, or how to regain your happiness.
What does it mean to be in an Unhappy Relationship?
When you start feeling dejected, worried and feel like you’re no longer enjoying your relationship or marriage, then you are not happy in the relationship.
Some couples fail to notice when their partner is sad. It is not obvious because you are not sensitive enough and your partner is hiding their feelings from you.
Unhappiness in a relationship manifests in the form of constant worrying or anxiety. You feel like your partner is no longer what they used to be at the beginning of the relationship. Although, you may not say it out, or show that you are worried. But inside of you, you are troubled. It simply means you are sad and tired of the relationship.
When you are not happy in a relationship, you tend to focus more on your family, work, and friends rather than on your partner or your relationship.
At times you get upset for no reason. Most times, you just feel like breaking up with your partner just to feel a sign of relief. All these are signs that you are no longer happy in your relationship. A relationship that makes you sad is equivalent to an unhealthy relationship.
Read also: How to cheer someone up
What Makes a Person Unhappy in a Relationship?
People don’t just become sad in their relationship. Things like unmet desires, lack of love and attention can make anyone unhappy in a relationship.
Other things that can trigger unhappiness in a relationship include infidelity, lack of trust, dishonesty, and physical or emotional abuse.
Below are the signs that tell if your boyfriend, girlfriend, wife, your husband, or even you are sad in your relationship.
7 Signs of an Unhappy Relationship
- You don’t open up to each other anymore
- You get upset for no reason
- You’ve stopped giving each other attention
- You spend more time with friends than with your partner
- Decrease in intimacy
- You don’t appreciate each other anymore
- You are always depressed
1. You don’t open up to each other anymore
One major way to know that someone is not happy in a relationship is when they suddenly stopped opening up to you. You are still living together as a couple, but they don’t tell you everything. They just pretend to be fine, whereas, they are not. They are simply tired of the relationship.
Maybe they have been complaining all this while, but you chose not to listen to them. Now, they choose to handle their unhappiness with the silent treatment. It is a sign that shows you or your partner is not happy in your relationship.
2. You get upset for no reason
If you notice that you or your partner normally get upset for no reason, then, you are no longer happy in the relationship. For instance, you get upset when they instruct you to do something. Your mind is no longer with your partner, and it is a sign you’re no longer enjoying the relationship.
Most times, you will notice that you often criticize each other. It is not because your partner is always wrong. Even if they are, that sadness in your heart does not allow you to appreciate their good side anymore.
3. You’ve stopped giving each other attention
If you ever wonder why your partner suddenly stopped giving you his/her time and attention, it’s because they are sad. They don’t want to know anything about you anymore (about your welfare). They don’t even care if the relationship succeeds or not. If you are equally doing the same, then you are also sad and tired of the relationship.
The spark in your relationship is gradually going down. And you don’t mind giving your partner a divorce note. It is a sign of unhappiness in a relationship.
4. You spend more time with friends than with your partner
A happy and healthy relationship is known by how much time you spend with your partner, plus other things like trust, communication, etc. But when you start spending more time with friends than with your partner, it’s a sign you are not happy in your relationship.
On the side of your partner, they equally prioritize other people or activities over you. They don’t mind if you even have a little discussion with them before going to bed. It’s a little indication that they’re no longer satisfied with the relationship.
5. Decrease in intimacy
Even if you indulge in sexual activities as a couple, you just do that to fulfill all righteousness. You are no longer connected spiritually, mentally, and emotionally as husband and wife or even as boyfriend and girlfriend.
No more tete a tete (love talk or private talk) as a couple. Your instinct tells you that you are no longer in an intimate relationship. The spark or passion between you and your partner has dwindled. You are just living together for the sake of what people might say if you divorce.
6. You don’t appreciate each other anymore
When you are sad in a relationship, you will find it difficult to see the good side of your partner. You will no longer appreciate their love for you. Rather, you will end up complaining all the time. It is a sign you are no longer happy in your relationship.
7. You are always depressed
Depression is a sign you lack joy in your heart while you are still dating your partner.
Your mood changes anytime you see your partner or think of returning home after the day’s work.
Some of the signs of depression include – the inability to work, study, eat, sleep, and enjoy life. So, if you notice you or your partner doing any of these, then you’re sad.
Here are the best ways to deal with depression in a relationship.
Have you tried to quit a sad relationship, but can’t? Here are the reasons.
Most couples find it difficult to quit their relationships, not minding they’re no longer interested in dating their partner. Why? Below are possible reasons.
1. The fear of what people will say
You are simply afraid of what your friends or family members will say if you break up with your partner. You don’t want to be criticized by your loved ones, friends, or church members if you are a Christian.
2. Fear of being single
The fear of being single holds many people from ending an unhappy relationship.
You thought that you won’t find love anymore if you end the relationship. That is why most couples don’t quit their relationship when things go wrong.
3. You so much love your partner
Love is powerful. It has the ability to either spare your life or destroy it.
Apart from the above-mentioned, another reason why you can’t leave an unsatisfactory relationship may likely be the love you have for your partner.
For instance, you already have a child in the relationship and wouldn’t want the child to be fatherless.
True Love is a very deep emotion. It doesn’t fade away so quickly. So, it may be because of the love you have for your partner that is holding you from ending the relationship.
What to do when you feel sad in your relationship
Follow these steps to recover when you find yourself unhappy in a relationship.
1. Discover the cause of your unhappiness
Identifying the reason(s) why you are so unhappy in your relationship is the first step to regain your happiness.
Are you sad as a result of your partner’s attitude towards you? Or any other reason? Figure out.
The first way to solving any problem is to discover the cause(s).
2. Face the problem
You’ve discovered what took away your joy in the relationship. It is now time to find a solution to those problems.
Was it your partner that provoked you? Maybe there’s this lifestyle you hate in them. It is time to make it open to them and settle the issue once and for all.
Keeping it to yourself will not help you. Stop hiding your feelings. Discuss the problem with him/her and regain your happiness.
3. If you can’t cope, end the relationship
Although it is not easy to break up with someone you dearly love. But what are you going to do since you can’t endure the relationship anymore?
Don’t you think it is better to end a relationship than to remain unhappy in it?
Break up is never the end of the road. If you can’t find pleasure in your partner anymore, then go ahead and quit. All that matters is your happiness. And you are responsible for it.
How to tell your partner you’re unhappy?
Be bold and honest with yourself. Tell him/her, there’s something very important you would like to discuss with them. And this had made you sad all this while.
Go ahead and tell them everything they’re doing you don’t like. And why they should change the lifestyle.
You don’t need to be a pro in a conversation to do this. All you have to do is to find the best day or time to say it.
If they fail to change, you can go ahead and end the relationship.
How to end an unhappy relationship
If you are still finding it difficult to quit, then consider the following ways.
1. Be determined to end the relationship for good
The first way to quit a sad relationship is to be determined to end the relationship for good.
Some end their relationship out of anger. Thereby creating enmity between them and their partner. It shouldn’t be so. Do everything with love and consider the other person’s feelings.
2. Discuss the breakup with your partner
The next step is to make your intention known to your partner.
Tell him/her that you are no longer interested in the relationship. But remember, don’t tell them in a lonely place to avoid rape or being beaten up. Do that in the public. Preferably in a restaurant or a bar.
3. Cease all forms of communication:
After ending the relationship, cease all forms of communication between you and your partner. Delete their contact and stop contacting them.
4. Move into a new relationship if you can:
Start a new relationship if possible. Starting a new relationship means starting a new life with another partner. Be happy and learn to forget your past feelings in order to enjoy your present relationship.
How to be happy again in a sad relationship
Regaining your happiness in an unhappy relationship isn’t as difficult as you think. With constant practice of the points I’m about to share with you, you will regain your joy.
1. Lay aside your past feelings
Laying aside your past feelings is all about forgetting whatever made you sad in the past. Maybe is the way your partner acts or treats you. Try and purge away those negative feelings by forgiving them. Try to know and understand the importance of forgiveness in a relationship.
2. Tell your partner how you feel
To remain happy in a relationship, don’t hide your feelings from your significant other.
When you are sad, let them know. It takes only a sensitive person to realize that their partner is sad. So, it is very essential to make your feelings known to your partner.
If they offend you, don’t keep it to yourself. Say it out and expect an apology from them. If they fail to apologize, forgive them and move on. I know how hard it is, but you just have to.
3. Socialize with friends:
Have fun with your friends. Distract yourself with some activities like watching funny videos, reading funny jokes, etc. It will help reduce the feelings.